OSTRICHES: [the Questioning]

This post is the second of a three-part documentation of the journey my overly-analytical mind took while hitting the replay button on the song below. Please give it a listen in its entirety before diving in; I've written out the lyrics for your convenience. Click here to read part one.

—   —   —

My False by Matt Corby

You see, I don't know where I'm running to

It's become quite hard to see

There's a guilty weight on my conscience

Of all my wrongful deeds

It's time to reconcile
It's time to reconcile

Oh, if I walk into the darkness, I'll be lost
But if I try to stay, the light will show my false

I will keep my head in the sand, dear

Let the grains block out the sun

With shame as my companion

It will stay close til I'm done

It's time to reconcile
It's time to reconcile

Oh, if I walk into the darkness, I'll be lost
But if I try to stay, the light will show my false


Oh, if I walk into the darkness, I'll be lost
But if I try to stay, the light will show my false

—   —   —

Songs are funny, cause the narrator might not necessarily be the guy who wrote it. But when I first heard the lyrics of this song, I immediately wished I could talk to the person whose sentiment they convey. There are so many things I'd want to ask... Questions that, if I'm being transparent, I would like to pose to most people I meet; there are some things that nobody spends time thinking about, and those tend to be the things that everyone should think about.

[the Questioning]

            —ask yourself—

Do you feel a lack of direction?

Why?

And why are you running when you don't know where you're going?

            —ask yourself—

Is guilt something you should just try to shake off?

Cause it's a tangible thing; You feel it. 

But do you think you should?

Is guilt something we deserve?

Why or why not?

And where does it come from?

            —ask yourself—

Are you more afraid of the stuff you do, or the idea that other people might find out?

What do you do with the shame you feel daily?

Is that something you just have to accept, or is the goal to try to ignore it?

Letting yourself be ignorant of your circumstances
—colloquially 'keeping your head in the sand'—
does that make it any better?

Do you think you deserve to feel better?

Why?

            —ask yourself—

What would make it better?

What is reconciliation?

To what or whom are you being reconciled?

How do you achieve it?

—   —   —

If I pay attention, I don't see people thriving.
It seems like the ache of this song is echoed in the hearts of everyone around me.

And maybe you've noticed, too.
Maybe, as hard as you try,
a purposeful, beautiful, joyful life just doesn't seem to be in the cards.
So here's my question:

Is this as good as it gets?

And if it isn't, why is everybody ignoring that fact—
—like ostriches with their heads in the sand?
It this isn't as good as it gets, then why is everybody pretending that it is?

Click here for part three