I NEED YOU TO HEAR THIS

Because I need to hear it every single day.

   —   —   —   —   —   —   —   —   —   —   —   —   —   —   —   —

"Do you know Jesus?" the woman asked me.

"Yes, I do."

"Do you sin?"

"Yeah. Every day... Probably more than I realize."

"THEN YOU'RE A CHILD OF THE DEVIL AND YOU DON'T KNOW JESUS."

Well.

If you are anything like me—and I know I am—

then there are two things you should know about this woman.

The first thing
                is that she is affiliated with a man who calls himself Brother Jed.

"I don't know how the whorehouses in this town stay open—

all of you sorority girls are giving it away for free!"

His voice echoed through the courtyard in front of Maucker Union, met with mocking laughter and jeers, declaring that feminists, liberals, homosexuals, alcoholics, fornicators, and those who smoke weed and/or listen to rock and roll are destined for Hell.

I'll concede to three points:
        1. His message was a call to repentance.
        2. His words were full of hatred, judgment, bigotry, and condemnation.
        3. His delivery was classless, tactless, graceless, and, most importantly, Christ-less.

The second thing
                         is that she believes her own lie.

On Monday afternoon, this warped view of the gospel manifested itself in condemnations shouted at each passing college student:

"You are all going to hell!"

"You are living sinful, wicked lifestyles!"

"You have to stop sinning in order to be with God!"

And I'm standing there, like:

"That's not necessarily true..."

"That's a pretty bold generalization..."

"That's... wait—

—what?"

LISTEN UP:
        If you are someone who thinks you have to get your shenanigans together before God wants anything to do with you, you need to ask yourself two very important questions:


FIRST:
              WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?
                                [that you could ever get your shenanigans together on your own]

SECOND:
              WHO DO YOU THINK GOD IS?
                                [that He couldn't handle your shenanigans at its worst]

I want you to think about something for a moment;

I want you to think about how wonderful it would be if there were not hateful, judgmental, hypocritical words being spoken every day by people who claim to follow Jesus Christ.

And I want you to think about precisely how you would feel if every church worldwide was calling out to you in a loud, resounding voice, saying,

"COME AS YOU ARE."

I mean, COME ON.

We are CHRISTIANS.

Followers of that man called JESUS.

AND THIS IS HOW HE DID CHURCH:

                Jesus was chilling in his house, hanging out with thugs and mafia members and prostitutes. And some really arrogant religious guys were like, "What the what? Why is he eating supper with all those sketchy people?" And Jesus was like, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”

[Mark 2:15-17, almost entirely paraphrased. Except for that part where Jesus talks... that part is legit.]

Okay, listen...

Listen.
LISTEN.
LISTEN TO ME:
THIS IS THE GOOD NEWS!

AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO YOU ARE, 
BUT I KNOW YOU NEED TO HEAR THIS.

I KNOW YOU NEED TO HEAR IT BECAUSE ALL OF US NEED TO.

IT DOESN'T MATTER WHO YOU ARE, WHERE YOU'VE BEEN, OR WHAT YOU'VE DONE—
THIS IS FOR YOU.

T H I S   I S   T H E   G O O D   N E W S :

*

For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,

and are justified by his grace as a gift,  through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus.

[Romans 3:23-24]

*

For the wages of sin is death,

but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

[Romans 6:23]

*

God shows his love for us in that

while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

[Romans 5:8]

*

For by grace you have been saved through faith.

And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God.

[Ephesians 2:8]

*

If it is by grace, it is no longer on the basis of works;

otherwise grace would no longer be grace.

[Romans 11:6]

*

If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord

and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead,

you will be saved.

[Romans 10:9]

*

There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus

from the law of sin and death.

[Romans 8:1-2]

*

GIRLS SO STUPID.

I like feeling pretty and cherished; I think this can be said of every girl. There's something about knowing that you are valued by others that gives you self-worth and confidence. Girls thrive off of this— myself included. To a certain extent there's nothing wrong with that. It's when we can't find any sense of self-worth without getting that positive attention, and when we become slaves to the admiration of others, and when our desire to feel 'loved' creates a stumbling block for others, that it becomes a problem.

Every girl knows that getting attention from most guys is as easy as wearing a low-cut shirt or short shorts. It's hard for a guy to ignore a pretty girl who is showing a little too much skin; that's just the way guys are—that's the way their minds work. If you haven't yet come to this realization, you are:

     a) definitely not a boy

            and

     b) inexcusably oblivious

Let's clear something up: I'm not here to bash guys in any way; they get enough grief. Men are called perverted and disgusting, constantly ridiculed for their apparent inability to keep their minds out of the proverbial gutter. Meanwhile, women dress with less and less modesty— making it nearly impossible for any men who actually desire to keep their thoughts away from sex to do so.

I'm not saying the blame should be entirely placed on women; there are certainly men in the world who are perverted pigs who disregard women and treat them as objects to satisfy their sexual desires. This is a reality. But there are two sides to every story, and I'm coming out of the woodworking to tell you the one less favored.

STORY TIME:
Last night I walked down a commonly-used staircase in my dorm that leads to both the laundry room and the mailboxes for every resident in the building. I live in a coed dorm. Before I made it to my box, my attention was arrested by a bulletin board loudly proclaiming, "Love your breasts!" There were random facts that I don't feel the need to repeat— mostly along the lines of body image and unrealistic standards created by the media, etc. And, don't get me wrong, I'm all for women being comfortable with their bodies and loving the way God made them. What appalled me was not the informative text provided, but rather the 10+ pictures of women in lingerie posted all over the board. I stood there for a substantial amount of time with my mouth hanging open, fuming. In a moment of disgust I paused to cross-check my fury against logic and principle, and after a quick glance down the hall I swiftly ripped off every one of the pictures. I threw them in the recycling bin. I left the facts on the board, unscathed.

It's not enough that the sunshine comes out, bringing with it short skirts and unnecessary amounts of skin... But women have actually felt the need, in the midst of pretending to fight unrealistic standards, to completely objectify women. Parading pictures of half-naked women infront of every guy that wants to do laundry or check his mail this month in the name of promoting good self-image? And yet we get angry with men when they stare at us. Not to mention that all this is occurring while women everywhere are crying out about the injustice of double standards.

I'm furious.

—————————

I started this post a week ago and I had to let it cool off before returning to it. There are many things I'd like to say, but instead I'm going to let God's word speak for itself, as it is far more capable than I:

Romans 6:12 "All things are lawful for me," but not all things are helpful. "All things are lawful for me," but I will not be enslaved by anything.

Romans 8:9, 11 Take care that this right of yours does not somehow become a stumbling block to the weak... by your knowledge this weak person is destroyed, the brother for whom Christ died. Thus, sinning against your brothers and wounding their conscience when it is weak, you sin against Christ.

Galatians 5:13-25 For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." But if you bite and devour one another, watch out that you are not consumed by one another. But I say, walk by the spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we love by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit.

1 Peter 3:3-4 Do not let your adorning be external— the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious.

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.

Galatians 1:10 For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ. 

—————————

To the Christ-following men who may be reading this: I commend you for the daily battle you have with lust, and I sincerely apologize for my gender's complete lack of sympathy for your struggles. It is truly inexcusable. I pray that you, my brothers in Christ, would rely on God's grace and strength to pursue holiness and live a life pleasing to He who saved us from the punishment we all deserve.

To the Christ-following women who may be reading this: I challenge you to look at the choices of your daily life— your words, your behavior, and the clothes you wear— as opportunities to uplift the body of Christ and glorify God. 

If I were God, I swear, I'd be so annoyed with me...

I remember when I was a youngin'.
I thought college kids were SO cool.
They were so adulty.
Independent. Confident. Awesome.
It was like, "Mannnn, I can't wait until I'm that old!"


Welp...
Here I am.
And some days I have to remind myself that I am, in fact, this old.
It's those days — the days when real life sneaks up, whops me on the back of the head and proceeds to run away, giggling — that I ask,
"EY! When did YOU get here?!"
Ridiculous, really — I've spent so much time in the last few years sitting around, praying and asking God for things. Telling Him I'm ready for this and that; ready to be used by Him and ready for real life to begin. As though I knew better than He what I was and was not ready for; as though 'real life' was something I hadn't yet entered.....

He waited patiently for the day that I finally realized I wasn't in control; the day when I willingly handed over the reins to the One who actually knows what the destination is. It was on this day that I realized that I was far better off trusting in the Author of the universe with my story than trying to feebly construct something of beauty on my own— and oh, what a day it was.

(a Tuesday, I think...)

Up next was the period in my life where I asked God what the plan was. I had acknowledged my lack-of-control-ness; I was now ready for whatever He had in store. The mildly satirical summation of my mindset was as follows:

"Hey, God. I have no control over anything; You've completely got it covered. You're awesome and powerful and loving and in control and all that stuff. Mmm."
*thoughtful pause*
"So. Since I fully trust you now and everything— where exactly are we going?"

Sarah Thvedt has given me some pretty brutal colloquial beatings to this effect.
I've grown to love it.
I've also grown from it; I've seen my capricious faithlessness and realized it takes more than that to truly hand my life over to my Creator.

And some days I feel peace about leaving my life in God's hands. Some days I worry about the future and where I'm headed. Some days I feel ready to take on the world and I wish He'd hurry up and let me in on the agenda. Some days I feel entirely inadequate for the tasks at hand.

Each and every day I feel blessed to have my life in His hands.

My God is a god who guides.
My God is a god who is in control.
My God is a god who has a perfect plan.
My God is a god who gives me everything I need.
My God is a god who knows the right timing for everything.
My God is a god who loves me despite my constant second-guessing.
My God is a god who is way more patient with me than I would be with myself.

...Thank God.

technology ruins lives

I'm sitting in the union, trying to work on an essay but getting distracted by the plethora of Mark Driscoll sermons available online. I'm sitting in a cushy armchair, munching on dry lucky charms and wishing I had headphones so I could listen to music. I'm sitting by a window, watching the snow and contemplating God's sovereignty. I'm sitting near a guy and a girl who are in a relationship, a couple that has been there for an hour and barely spoken 10 words to each other.
They walked in together.
They found a pair of chairs.
They each pulled out their fancy shmancy smart phones and never looked back.

Do you s'pose they're in love? Do you s'pose they think they are?

I mean, I know I don't know them...
But...
That can't be what it's s'posed to look like.

Today has been

                                   ...one of those days.

Wretched things:

I'm sick.

I'm tired.

I'm stressed.

I'm confused.

I miss camp.

I miss soccer.

I miss my friends.

I miss my family.

Things that always make me feel better:
Prayer.
Reading Donald Miller.
Being cozy.
Watching glorious sunsets.
Getting a back rub that's so good it hurts.
Feeling pretty.
Going on walks at night.
Listening to Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong.
Jumping in puddles.
Painting.
Hearing the Truth.
Drinking raspberry chai.
Hugs.
Assurance that God knows what He's doing.

I'm looking for a place

where I can plant my faith.

One thing I know for sure;

that I cannot create it

and I cannot sustain it.

It's Your love that's keeping me

Please be my strength. 

Please be my strength,

cause I don't have any more.

I don't have any more.

And at my final breath,

I hope that I can say,

"I fought the good fight of faith."

I pray your glory shines 

in this doubting heart of mine

And all would know that You--

You are my strength.

You are my strength;

You and You alone.

You keep bringing me back home.